Is this short enough, damn it?

I've received at least one request to abbreviate the length of my entries. So here it is... that's it.

Sleep is for the wicked... or something like that.

So here I am. Sitting on my computer at 4:30 AM. Looking around at the websites I check on a relatively regular basis. You know, the basic school spirited college student website rounds - webmail, facebook, gatorzone, scout.com, a few blogs, etc. I try to sleep, but I can't ease my mind enough to do so. It's not even that something is on my mind that I just can't seem to shake away.

Perhaps it's the lack of a retainer because it's been agitating me lately, or maybe I've consumed entirely too much caffeine over the past few days (yeah, I've been a bad boy, I need to drink more water darn it.) To be honest, I really don't know why the heck I can't sleep, but I can't. I wish my mind had a power switch that I could easily flip on and off as I pleased, but to my knowledge, it doesn't exist.

I should take this time to consider the past few days. I'm pretty happy that Brian came up for the weekend. I really do enjoy having guests come to stay, it's a good change of pace and I can play entertainer, even though I'm absolutely not essential for the entertainment. Spending time with friends is never a bad thing.

Anypoo, I suppose I should resume my overwhelmingly difficult pursuit of this profoundly evasive state of sleep that I so greatly desire to attain at this point in time. Wow, read that sentence and tell me I don't need to get my ass to sleep.

Simply incredible.

Mr. McCoole once said, "Rocks are gneiss, so don't take that schist for granite." Okay, so maybe I added schist in there, but he said something along those lines. The irony is that I don't exactly remember what the line was, because at the time, I took the statement for granted. An event that happens astoundingly frequently. The world is filled with so many incredible little intricacies that are beyond belief. The mere fact that we exist, that we can see, hear, smell, touch, and taste - remarkable. I could go on and on with all the things that pretty much no one ever thinks about, that makes life what it is, and we couldn't possibly imagine a world without them.

It's impossible to really truly be thankful and grateful for every single phenomenon in the universe. We don't even know everything there is to be thankful for in the first place. But regardless, I think it's important to sometimes take a step back and think. Think of all the amazing sights you see everyday - the vast blue skies, the beautiful sunsets, the pretty flowers, the sound of rain trickling down, the look of pure happiness on a babies face when it sees its mother. Sit back and be thankful for all of it.

Furthermore, I've realized that among the most prominent things I take for granted - and undoubtedly the majority of everyone else, as well - are other people. The most obvious of which would be my parents. To think of everything they've done for me is baffling. They brought me into this world, they raised me to be the person I am, and they've thoroughly supported me in every way imagineable throughout all of it. If I thanked them every time I saw them for the rest of my life, it still would fall short of giving them the thanks they truly deserve.

But I don't. I don't thank them when I see them, and sadly, I don't even tell them I love them most of the time. Maybe that's because it's just never been customary in my family, but should that really be an excuse? Although, it should be noted that when someone says "I love you," to everyone, everytime they see them, it really takes away from the meaning and impact of the statement. It should be used with discretion. But I almost never say it, and I hope they know I do.

It extends further than my parents though. It's easy to take others for granted as well. I take my brother for granted all too often. If it weren't for him, I'd be a totally different person. He's helped and guided me so much over the years. And so many friends as well. Friends can really be a godsend. They can put so much effort and devotion into being there for you and supporting you. But a lot of times you don't really think about how privileged you are to have them.

I think it's important to recognize how grateful you are for everyone and everything in your life. Make sure they know how important they are to you. I know it's easy to feel underappreciated, so I want to make sure that everyone in my life who reads this now know how I feel. You guys make life worth living.

Ugh.

Living in an apartment is unbelievably depressing. At least, it is when you have absolutely no income whatsoever and you're paying for all the copious influx of bills out of your ever so constantly dwindling savings account. I really really hope I manage to get a job next Fall, because I sure as hell didn't manage to get one for summer. (No "I told you so"s.)

Dirty dirty...

Haha, I can't help but giggle when I see this picture. It is just one of many awesome pictures that I had completely forgotten existed until I ran across them on my dad's computer the other day. Yay for pictures.

Bring on the sunshine...

Mmm... being awake at 7:30 in the morning is a nice change of pace. I enjoy to try to look at such things optimistically. It's a good way to combat a mind meandering about the veracity of a concept like karma. Sometimes it's almost as if only the bad variety exists, or just a complete lack of justice in the world, I'm not quite sure.

However, that's bullshit. I'm being a whiny little bitch and wallowing in self pity - the stupidest thing I could possibly do. Unfortunately, I just really don't know of any other way to be anymore. Basically, just ignore anything I have written here because it's absolutely ridiculous, unnecessary and uncalled for. I think I just needed to write it out to get it out of my system.

In any event, the morning is beautiful. The birds are chirping, the weather is crisp (a warm crisp maybe, but crisp nonetheless) and the sun is doing what it does best, shining its little heart out. Just because minute little things happen sometimes that bother you, it doesn't mean that things won't ultimately work out for the best. You just have to continue to be strong and believe in who you are, and know that you do everything you can do to be the best person you possibly can be. To be the best, loving, caring friend you can be and not let minor details get in the way.